Change Your Perspective

Let's be real, almost all of us had big plans for 2020. I did. This year was the year where I had all sorts of things plan and I was excited about them. I got all the goals I want to achieve by the end of the year. Then something happened that I, nor anyone else in the world, couldn't have predicted before. The pandemic *cue eye roll here*

I had a chat with this lovely woman yesterday and she said something that was quite intriguing to me. She said that everyone is so focused on 2020 to be over and they forgot to make the best of the last days of it. When she said that, I felt a tingling sensation in my gut. A sensation that I would feel whenever a realization strikes.

Looking back to these past months in 2020, I realized that I have been forced to change. I, for one, have always struggled with the concept of change (my Disappointment Panda will vouch for this). I always thought, when everything is going well, why should anything change? Yes, I seem to have forgotten that there are some things that I can't control and that includes changes in life.

While the pandemic is terrible and there are so many people that are sadly affected by it and in no way that I am minimizing the effect, personally, it has brought quite a big change for me. But of course, this change did not happen willy-nilly, just like every changes I had to go through, I had to struggle to accept it too.

Honestly, going through the pandemic is like going through the 5 stages of grief, for me at least. At the beginning of this whole situation, I was in denial. "It'll be over in a month and everything will be normal again", I thought. Then when it didn't change after a month, I became frustrated and angry. This whole thing was fucking up all my plans! Then I progressed to bargaining stage. Maybe, If I don't read the news, I would feel better about this whole thing. Which clearly was not the case, because, conspiracy or not, the pandemic IS happening and my anxiety kept visiting me regularly. Funner!

I got so tired of going through this stages over and over again that one day I realized that everything is never going to be the same again. So, I decided to change my perspective towards the pandemic and try to no longer see it as something that is crippling and limiting. Look, if I can't be in control of what's happening out there in the world, the least I can do is control how I respond to it.

Funny thing about changing your perspective is that it doesn't happen overnight. For me, there were this ongoing inner battles between my conscience and ego that is trained and has a whole range of mechanisms to defend its honor against changes. My conscience realized that I have to go through changes in order to stay sane through this tough times, whereas my ego was like "FUCK CHANGE! KEEP FIGHTING THIS PROBLEM WITH AGGRESSION!!" Braveheart style, Mel Gibson would have been proud!

I feel like my conscience is like this super patient, nurturing mother figure and my ego is like a 5 year old throwing tantrums every time nap time comes. Eventually, the 5 year old will get tired and succumb to napping. And once again, my conscience won the battle, putting the 5 year old in the comfortable bed, tucking it with one cozy blanket, patiently waiting for it to wake up and throw another tantrum.

Going back to what that lovely woman said, it made so much sense to me. True, the effect of the pandemic is horrible with all its restrictions and lockdowns still happening everywhere, but, it doesn't mean that we have to be miserable and let everything go down the drain. Change that perspective. There's always something to learn about in situations that are happening, including this ongoing pandemic. And no, this is not toxic positivity, this is acknowledging that the situation IS devastating but also realizing that despite it, life is still happening.

I see a lot of people posting on social media about how eager they are, now that we're almost in the last 2 months of 2020, which sort of tickles my brain. Not to sound depressing and dark, while it's good to be hopeful, who could really tell if 2021 is going to be better than 2020 or if the pandemic will be over by then. It's not like the pandemic came with an expiry date. If there's anything that we can all takeaway from 2020 is that nothing is guaranteed. And yes, I did use one of the most cliche quotes out there, but 2020 is a huge proof of that.

So, now that 2021 is only a couple of months away, let's make the best out of 2020. It's time to stop playing the victim card. Yes, we are the victims of the pandemic, but we are so not the victim of 2020. To be fair, 2020 has done nothing to you. So why blame 2020? Instead of focusing on the terrible situation, analyze everything that had gone wrong this year and flip it around. Realize that this year has offered the best lesson anyone could ever experienced and it is all up to you how you want to translate that into your life. Empathize with those who have lost their loved ones and show gratitude that you are still able to breathe. Appreciate the little things in life, because that is what matters the most now. Do the things you can do now to help propel you to a better 2021, pandemic or not.

So, here's to making the best of the last 2 months of 2020. As Captain Jack Sparrow wisely said "The problem is NOT the problem. Your attitude about the problem is the problem". Cheers!